Zero Changes Till I Change

For Years I’ve Been Waiting…Zero Changes Till I Change

For the missing piece of the puzzle…to turn up…
Searching from one “Guru” to another… to see if they had it…
To tell me what area will be best for me to work in online
To finally have “the success online” I have been looking for.

You see, somewhere way back,
I figured if I learned how to make $1 –
I could work out how I did it and repeat it.
Then I would follow my “hearts desires”

For 10 years I kept searching for the “right” website to have
The “perfect” niche to be in.
You know that used my strengths,
To supply exactly the missing puzzle piece of what the marketplace needed,
Used my talents &  skills to impact the world.

My goal was always to help as many people as I could
With the best possible solution, and create value,
To help solve the challenge they faced
In their journey to make it a little easier.

Helping Others Was Important

It was important to me that I felt congruent helping others,
A picture that matched my struggle story,
That I achieved in contributing in and I can have significance in…
That I can “finally” make my unique difference in…the world…?

Anyway,  after 10 years of subconsciously repeating the same cycles,
I begin to wonder…
Should I be looking for something that isn’t “perfect” for me?
Should I be looking for something that isn’t the right answer?

Guru’s & Their Friends Promotions

Whenever a promotion came out from the
“Guru’s & Their Friends”
Which let’s face it,
was at least every week or sometimes more often,

I would read their promotion and almost feel compelled to purchase it,
With the offer If I really want success!
(If I had the money – I would feel like I had won the lottery !
And I would watch it and learn as much as I could – although all seemed to say the same thing – time and time again… to run a successful businesses.)

I was living by their agenda,
I would check emails to see if there was any “important”emails
Even when I woke at midnight..
Sent to me, on their schedule, I would hope something important would come.

(Although if I didn’t have the money – I would feel I am missing another piece of the puzzle.)
I would feel like I had the missing numbers in the lottery!
It’s a waste of time.
I’d feel sad and like I couldn’t continue on my online journey, without that one offer of that guru’s solution.
I would wish I had the money so I could get this “final” missing puzzle piece.
(So I thought…)

Even though at times,
The promotions were of no value at all to me
At my beginning stages of business,
Just somewhere down the road I’d need it – wouldn’t I?

Business or Hobby?

After many attempts, trials, goes… a products and business.
My husband was beginning to wonder, is it a business or a hobby.
He was fine with either one, and just wanted me to declare it, so I accepted it…
So I would take responsibility for it either way.

Although they could see, something in me that I couldn’t see…
They saw, I had a dream and gave me the gift of a surprise for my birthday.
The surprise connected my heart, body and mind as I realised
All my family want, is for me to be true to me and follow my reason I was born… my dream.

I wondered what I had been waiting for?
Is it to get permission from someone?
Was I waiting for the perfect solution, one built just for me?
Was I searching for something that… that the world needed…
Instead of searching for what made me come alive?

At 17 I had come out of life-giving surgery on my way home out of the hospital,
I wanted to scream out -“wake up” to the people I saw – doctors, nurses, a cleaner, a person passing by.
I didn’t understand, they all seemed stuck in some daze or automatic mode.
I felt blessed I didn’t die or have muscles in my face cut during surgery,  I Am Alive!

I want everyone to have that feeling of coming alive everyday!
Yet stuff happened, work, marriage, house, children 1,2,3, ageing parents,
I got a means to an ends job, because I felt we were short on money,
I felt I had given up everything important to me to do the job.

Most of all I had lost Me in the process of surviving life –
Who I Am… What am I born to be, do & have –
How can I make my difference –
How can I contribute my gift to the World

Checkout Greeting

I was at the checkout
And the person behind the counter said
In an automatic voice – like a robot – How-are-you-today.

I realised I had been living in robot mode too.
Tears started to fall down my face
Just one or two at first, then the flood gates opened
I am finally connecting with who I am… I am becoming alive!

No Emotions

I don’t have to squash my emotions,
Just to do as the boss says “get the job done.”
I don’t have to shut down my creativity, innovation & uniqueness
I can be all I am born to be, because that is what makes me become alive!

Oh No! Not Me?
When I think about the possibility of becoming alive
It scares me, I am safe being a robot – I don’t have to feel or think just do.
Following everyone else -Not standing out in the crowd

Yet something deep inside me keeps fighting to get free
My authenticity
My reason for being born
My unique difference. – My gift…

So What Does Zero Changes Till I Change Mean?

When I think about it-
Zero Changes Till I Change –
All this time the ball has been in my court
I haven’t done what it takes to make it happen.

I have tried for a while and failed
I have tried some more and failed
I have tried again and failed
Then I have tried something else because it didn’t work.

When I listen to the training of the successful marketers
Not the rip off merchants – who I never want to go back to ever!,
But the authentic, caring business owners the people who are in there for life…
their process goes something like this…

Try, fail, learn from it
Try, fail, learn from it
Try, fail, learn from it
Try, fail, learn from it

Try, fail, keep trying and failing and learning
Working out all the ways it’s not working and fixing the problems
Then trying again – Not until it gets hard or tough or challenging
Try and Fail Until you do it!

When you learned a new skill like to walk, write, read
No one told you, after you tried a few times –
Well you tried enough now – Just crawl everywhere – writing or reading is not for you.
Of course not, you kept trying, and kept trying… Until – You did it!

Yet I know, If I don’t change
What will be the difference in my life 5 or 10 years from now?
If I choose to stay the same and not challenge the status quo.
I will have that niggling feeling whenever it’s quiet or silent
The longing in my gut to somehow contribute, help other people and make a difference.

3 Questions to Consider

  1. Are you doing what makes you become alive?
  2. Are you congruent – heart and mind on the same path?
  3. Are you reaching your potential?

When I choose “Zero Changes Till I Change” –
I know three things –

  1. I know I am enough for the challenges that come – This too will pass – I control my choices.
  2. I know I am accepting the past & designing my life today and for tomorrow.
  3.  I know I am worthy and taking responsibility for my life

Create a great day!

Annie Born
Discover Your Dream